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mohammed123  
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote mohammed123 Replybullet Topic: Salam Alikum
    Posted: 10 May 2008 at 10:53pm
As Salam Alikum,
                           Does anyone know if it is allowed in Islam for a guy to approach a muslim sister and propose her for marriage? and also for a girl  to approach a muslim brother and propose him for marriage?
 
JazakAllah Khair !
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hamayoun  
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote hamayoun Replybullet Posted: 10 May 2008 at 11:20pm
Salam

Umm... why not?
May Allah give me patience, Ameen.

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saira3  
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote saira3 Replybullet Posted: 11 May 2008 at 12:03am
Originally posted by hamayoun

Salam

Umm... why not?


because he should be asking the girl's wali for her hand in marriage, isnt that the right way in Islam??
i thought it was

SAIRA3 AKA SAIRA2 AKA SAIRA!!
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mohammed123  
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote mohammed123 Replybullet Posted: 11 May 2008 at 1:01am
who is sure guys? Saira? or Humayoun?
 
Both the replies are so contradicting each other
 
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Al-Cordoby  
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote Al-Cordoby Replybullet Posted: 11 May 2008 at 1:08am
Both are right, and it depends on the situation
 
In a very conservative family/environment, the right approach is to ask her family, and get the answer of whether she accepts or not through them
 
If on the other hand it's a colleague at work for example, asking for a clue first on whether she would accept or not before meeting her family would not be wrong
 
So which case is it?
 
 
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote Guests Replybullet Posted: 11 May 2008 at 1:09am
He should speak to the wali, but it's totally up to the girl.  He should not be alone with the girl, for one thing.  And another thing, it's respect--she may not want to say 'no' to his face.  
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IssaRaheem  
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote IssaRaheem Replybullet Posted: 11 May 2008 at 4:34am
Salaam,
 
Didn't the Prophet's (SAAW) first wife Khadija propose to Muhammed (SAAW)?


Edited by IssaRaheem - 11 May 2008 at 4:34am
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hamayoun  
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote hamayoun Replybullet Posted: 11 May 2008 at 6:40am
Salam

If the brother is asking if it's halal or haram: it is definitely NOT haram.  There is no sin in doing this at all.  If he is asking if it's the right thing to do, that depends on the situation, culture, etc.  As has been mentioned, there are other aspects as well: the wali, not being alone, etc.  But from a purely halal/haram aspect, its is halal for sure.

And Allah knows best.
May Allah give me patience, Ameen.

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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote Guests Replybullet Posted: 11 May 2008 at 10:37am
Also, according to the Ahnaf it depends on whether the woman has been previously married or not. If not then going through a wali is necessary, if so then it isn't.
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jamilahz  
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote jamilahz Replybullet Posted: 11 May 2008 at 11:18am
Originally posted by IssaRaheem

Salaam,
 
Didn't the Prophet's (SAAW) first wife Khadija propose to Muhammed (SAAW)?


Yes but she arranged it through someone.  She did not ask directly.
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IssaRaheem  
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote IssaRaheem Replybullet Posted: 11 May 2008 at 1:11pm
Originally posted by jamilahz

Originally posted by IssaRaheem

Salaam,
 
Didn't the Prophet's (SAAW) first wife Khadija propose to Muhammed (SAAW)?


Yes but she arranged it through someone.  She did not ask directly.
 
Who approached Muhammed (SAAW) for Khadija?
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jamilahz  
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote jamilahz Replybullet Posted: 11 May 2008 at 1:15pm
I think it was Nufaysa bint Umayyah, a friend of Khadija
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jamilahz  
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote jamilahz Replybullet Posted: 11 May 2008 at 1:24pm
Ok, Just looked this up from 'the Sealed Nectar'

When he returned to Makkah, Khadijah noticed, in her money, more profits and blessings than she used to. Her hireling also told her of Muhammadís good manners, honesty, deep thought, sincerity and faith. She realized that she homed at her target. Many prominent men had asked for her hand in marriage but she always spurned their advances. She disclosed her wish to her friend Nafisa, daughter of Maniya, who immediately went to Muhammad [pbuh] and broke the good news to him. He agreed and requested his uncles to go to Khadijahís uncle and talk on this issue. Subsequently, they were married. The marriage contract was witnessed by Bani Hashim and the heads of Mudar. This took place after the Prophetís return from Syria. He gave her twenty camels as dowry. She was, then, forty years old and was considered as the best woman of her folk in lineage, fortune and wisdom. She was the first woman whom the Messenger of All‚h [pbuh] married. He did not get married to any other until she had died.
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IssaRaheem  
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote IssaRaheem Replybullet Posted: 11 May 2008 at 4:23pm
So it was a woman who approached Muhammed (SAAW) for Khadija? So it's ok for a woman to approach a man, as long as it's not the woman who is actually asking for marriage?

Edited by IssaRaheem - 11 May 2008 at 4:30pm
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