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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote a well wisher Replybullet Posted: 07 October 2009 at 5:10pm
 
 
Obligation
 
Nasrudin nearly fell into a pool one day. A man whom he knew slightly was nearby, and saved him. Every time he met nasrudin after that he would remind him of the service which he had performed. When this had happened several times nasrudin took him to the water, jumped in, stood with his head just above water and shouted:
 
 "Now I am as wet as I would have been if you had not saved me! Leave me alone."
La ilaha ill-Allah, Muhammadur Rasulullah
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote a well wisher Replybullet Posted: 08 October 2009 at 11:31pm

  'Can you Identify Yourself?'


Nasrudin went into a bank that he did not usually use and asked to withdraw a large sum of money from his account. The bank clerk was naturally suspicious and asked him politely:

Have you any means of identifying yourself?

Nasrudin reached down into the pockets of his long cloak and found an ornate mirror. He held the mirror up and looked studiously into it and exclaimed to the clerk:

Yes, that's me all right.

La ilaha ill-Allah, Muhammadur Rasulullah
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote a well wisher Replybullet Posted: 09 October 2009 at 6:50pm

The philosophers, logicians and doctors of law were drawn up at Court to examine Mulla Nasrudin. This was a serious case, because he had admitted going from village to village saying: "The so-called wise men are ignorant, irresolute, and confused." He was charged with undermining the security of the State.

"You may speak first," said the King.

"Have paper and pens brought," said the Mulla. Paper and pens were brought.

"Give some to each of the first seven savants." The pens were distributed.

"Have them separately write an answer to this question: "What is bread?" This was done. THe papers were handed to the King who read them out:

The first said: "Bread is a food."

The second: "It is flour and water."

The third: "A gift of God."

The fourth: "Baked dough."

The fifth: "Changeable, according to how you mean 'bread.'"

The sixth: "A nutritious substance."

The seventh: "Nobody really knows."

"When they decide what bread is," said Nasrudin, "it will be possible for them to decide other things. For example, whether I am right or wrong. Can you entrust matters of assessment and judgment to people like this? Is it not strange that they cannot agree about something which they eat each day, yet are unanimous that I speak with no knowledge?"

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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote a well wisher Replybullet Posted: 10 October 2009 at 10:38pm
 
Nasrudin was sitting among the branches of a tree,
sniffing the blossoms and sunning himself.
A traveller with a sincere intention asked him what he was doing there.

'Climbing the Great Pyramid.'

'You are nowhere near a pyramid.
And there are four ways up a pyramid:
one by each face.
That is a tree!'
'Yes!' said the Mulla.
'But it's much more fun like this, don't you think?
Birds, blossoms, zephyrs, sunshine.
I hardly think I could have done better.'
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote a well wisher Replybullet Posted: 11 October 2009 at 7:16pm
 
 
One day Mulla Nasrudin said to his wife, 'Bring me a piece of cheese.
 
 Cheese is nutritious, pleasing to the taste, and easy to eat.'
'Mulla!' she cried, 'there's no cheese in the house.'
Nasrudin continued, 'Cheese can go bad and smell. It can give you nightmares - and it costs too much.'

'Now,' said Mrs Nasrudin, 'which statement is the right one?'

'It all depends,' said the Mulla, 'on whether you have any cheese or not.'
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote a well wisher Replybullet Posted: 12 October 2009 at 6:45pm
 
Mulla Nasrudin had an insatiable craving for knowledge, but did not seem to know what knowledge was. As a result he asked a local wise man the stupidest questions, always based upon random assumptions.
 
One day the Mulla noticed that his donkey was missing. He ran to the wise man's house.

'Well, Mulla, what is it this time?'
'My donkey is gone! Where can I find it?'

The wise man was quite fed up with the Mulla. 'Nasrudin,' he said, 'the donkey has run off, turned into a man and been ap-pointed the magistrate in the next town.'

Thanking the wise man for his information, the Mulla trudged to the court. There sat the magistrate, and Nasrudin shook his fist at him:

'Come home at once, you foolish animal!'
The magistrate was furious. 'Who are you and how dare you talk to me like that? I'll have you sent to the cells!'
'I'm the well-known Mulla Nasrudin, and I have it on the best authority that you are my donkey.'

'That's ridiculous. Nobody in his right senses would credit such a thing!'
Nasrudin drew himself up to his full height. 'Say what you like he said, 'I prefer to believe the statement of a wise man rather than that of a donkey.'

 

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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote a well wisher Replybullet Posted: 13 October 2009 at 7:27pm
 
One day Nasrudin and his friend stopped at a little restaurant. They were both very thirsty and decided to share a glass of milk. When the milk came, the friend suggested that Nasrudin drink half first.”I have got a little sugar with me,” said the friend, “but it is just enough for me. So after you have drunk your half I will add the sugar to my half.”
 
"Why don’t you add it now?” Nasrudin said. “I will only drink my half.” “No, no. This little bit of sugar cannot sweeten a full glass of milk,” said the man. So Nasrudin went and got some salt from the kitchen.
 
”Well then,” he said. “You can sweeten your half later. But I will have my half after adding this salt to it.”
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote a well wisher Replybullet Posted: 16 October 2009 at 12:19am
 
 
One day an illiterate man came to Mullah Nasruddin with a letter he had received. 
Mullah Nasruddin, please read this letter to me.
Mullah Nasruddin looked at the letter, but could not make out a single word. So he told the man.
I am sorry, but I cannot read this. The man cried:
For shame, Mullah Nasruddin ! You must be ashamed before the turban you wear (i.e. the sign of education)
Mullah Nasruddin removed the turban from his own head and placed it on the head of the illiterate man, said:
There, now you wear the turban. If it gives some knowledge, read the letter yourself.
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote a well wisher Replybullet Posted: 17 October 2009 at 12:58am
Avoiding Criticism
 
Mullah Nasrudin and his son were riding the donkey to the town market. A group of people passed. Mulla heard them whisper: “What times are these? Look at those two, have they no mercy on the poor animal?”

Nasrudin, hearing this, tells his son to get off and continue the journey on foot. Another group of people passing by and seeing this comment: “What times are these? Look at this man. His poor son with his frail body has to walk while he at his best age is riding the donkey!”

Hearing this, Nasrudin tells his son to ride the donkey and he himself gets off to walk the rest of the way. A third group of people seeing this remark: “What times are these? This young man is riding the donkey while his sickly old father has to walk!”

Hearing this, Nasrudin tells his son to get off the animal and they both walk with the donkey trailing behind. Another group passing by point to them, laughing: “Look at these idiots. They have a donkey and they are walking all the way to the market!”

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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote a well wisher Replybullet Posted: 17 October 2009 at 7:52pm
 
Philosopher: “I have been traveling, researching, and contemplating for years, trying to determine when the end of the world will be—yet I still have not found out the answer. Mulla, do you know when the end of the world will be?”

Nasrudin: “Yes—I have known that information for a long time.”

Philosopher: “Well, will you share this knowledge with me?”

Nasrudin: “Of course. When I die, that will be the end of the world.”

Philosopher: “Are you certain that will be the end of the world?”

Nasrudin: “It will be for me.”
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote a well wisher Replybullet Posted: 18 October 2009 at 7:25pm
 
 
The Town Gossip: “Nasrudin, I just saw a huge tub of stew that some men were transporting.”

Nasrudin: “What’s it to me?”
The Town Gossip: “They were delivering it to your house.”

Nasrudin: “What’s it to you?”
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote a well wisher Replybullet Posted: 19 October 2009 at 11:52pm
 
 
A monk enters and states:

"My master taught me to spread the word that mankind will never be fulfilled until the man who has not been wronged is as indignant about a wrong as the man who actually has been wronged."

The assembly is momentarily impressed.

 Then Nasruddin speaks: "My master taught me that nobody at all should become indignant about anything until he is sure that what he think is a wrong is in fact a wrong-and not a blessing in disguise!"
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote a well wisher Replybullet Posted: 20 October 2009 at 11:38pm
 
 
Nasrudin went to a Turkish bath. As he was poorly dressed the attendants treated him in a casual manner, gave him only a scrap of soap and an old towel. When he left, Nasrudin gave the two men a gold coin each. He had not complained, and they could not understand it. Could it be, they wondered, that if he had been better treated he would have given an even larger tip?
 
The following week Nasrudin appeared again. This time, of course, he was looked after like a king. After being massaged, perfumed and treated with the utmost deference, he left the bath, handing each attendant the smallest possible copper coin.
 
"This," said Nasrudin, "is for last time. The gold coins were for this week."
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Rating: 0 of 0 votes Quote a well wisher Replybullet Posted: 21 October 2009 at 7:26pm
 
 
One day Nasrudin asked a wealthy man for some money.

"What do you want it for?"

"To buy an elephant."

"If you have no money you will not be able to maintain an
elephant."

"I asked for money, not advice!"

La ilaha ill-Allah, Muhammadur Rasulullah
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